State side

Well, about 28 hours later, I made it back home. Safely with no problems. It is nice to be home. Nice to see my family, and my puppy was particularly excited to see me when she came to pick me up at the airport with my brother.

My great summer adventure of 09 is over. I am so happy that I made the decision to go and do this work. I look forward to more travels in the future. But for now, a new adventure begins. Year two of grad school with lots of new possibilities. I'm excited to see where it all goes ...

xo
KJ

Waiting at the airport

So, the time has come. I am at the airport in Delhi. Getting ready to leave India and head back to the states. Sitting here, I am getting really excited to go back. I am going to be really happy to see my family and friends. It will be really nice to be home. Plus, I am kind of disappointed in the last couple of days and am glad to have that part done with. And today was actually just pretty shitty overall, so I am happy to be leaving this particular day. It was just a lot of driving. Some final shopping, not getting the deals that I had been told I could find but because it was my last day, not having much of a choice. Kind of annoying. Driving through really heavy rains which was kinda scary. Stopping by a shop and one of the sales men being totally inappropriate and making me feel SO uncomfortable and trying to kiss me before I could get the hell out of there. And all under the pretense of it being Indian culture and a gift he has to read people and the spiritual side of the country, bull shit. He was simply a creep that tries to take advantage of women traveling by themselves. And it makes me that much more angry at him that he was trying to use something spiritual and special to justify his totally out of line behavior. And then my driver telling me that the restaurant he was supposed to take me to doesn’t open until seven, which is when I needed to leave for the airport and me arguing with him until he finally agreed to take me somewhere else. And then of course there was tons of traffic so if we had left later I would have been totally stressed out and rushing at the airport. And then he took me to a monument I had already been to on Friday and he told me to get out and take pictures. I was like, no, I’ve been here. He was like, really? And I was also starving at this point so I was pretty mad. BUT I finally was able to get some food, leave at the time I had wanted to the airport and make it with plenty of time.

The airport is full of people wearing masks, which I guess makes sense due to the sudden increase of swine flu here. I’m glad I’m leaving now so mom doesn’t worry about me.

I am a little worried about this flight. Last time I was really prepared, at least mentally. I had thought about it a lot. This time I have not. I am about to spend 15 hours on an airplane and then another 9 in transit and another plane and I have not thought about it. But I have a book and ipod and sleeping pills. So with all of that combined with the in flight entertainment system I’ll literally have at my fingertips, I think I’ll be able to manage, one way or another.

Starting to wrap up …

As I get ready to leave India, I am trying to think about the last six weeks and what they have meant to me. It has been kind of strange for me to be keeping a blog, but I am glad I did. There is a lot that I did not include on here, but it was fun getting to share some of my experiences.

On a number of levels this trip has been amazing. I learned so much from the students and professors here. I had some intense and amazing experiences during field work and talking to people in very remote villages. The extremes and contrast of this country continue to amaze me, as does its diversity and its beauty. The poverty is extreme. Everywhere you go is crowded. The colors are beautiful. The people are incredibly nice. The food is delicious. Being involved on this project has meant a lot to me personally, to be actively working on solutions to the water crisis is incredible. And traveling to different places and hearing stories inside people’s homes is emotional and transforming. The people that I have met will stay with me. On a personal level this trip has also been an incredibly healing six weeks. It has meant so much to be able to be here and do this, to show to myself that I can, to be away from the comforts and familiarity of home, and to get through it not just in one piece, but stronger. I have learned new things about myself. And most of all I have gotten to experience a country that is absolutely amazing. If anyone is thinking about visiting India, I highly recommend it.

If I see one more palace or place of historical importance …

I have been learning a whole lot over the past few days. I’ve seen amazing sites and met some interesting people. But the time for sightseeing is DONE. I am very over it. The first few times I heard the lineage of the Mughal dynasty, I still found it interesting. No more monuments, no more history, no more restaurants that are only filled with other foreigners. I’m done. I miss Kolkata, at least kind of knowing my surroundings, having more things to do and people around. It has been great and I have learned a lot, but it’s also been a bit of an overload.

Leaving soon

I have two nights left in India. Although I have been homesick, I am now not ready to leave. It has been an incredible summer and I have learned so much. There is amazing work going on here and amazing people doing it. I am really excited to see my family and to start the year back up in the bay in my new apartment with new classes and internships and to see my friends. But I will also be sad to leave this country. There is so much that I did not see, so much that I have not learned. So many more people I want to spend time with and places I want to visit and get to know. I want to come back next summer and see more! I want to catch up with everyone at home and try to share this experience as best as I can. It has been amazing for me on so many levels. But I also wish that it was not quite over, that I had just a little more time. It is really hard to believe that my time to leave has almost come. That six weeks have passed since I arrived here. So much has happened during this time. I hope I can carry most of it with me.

Taj Mahal

What can you say after you have seen one of the wonders of the world? How can one capture with words the beauty of one of the greatest memorials of love ever? Seeing the Taj Mahal, being there in person, was an incredible experience.

I got to touch the marble, trace the jeweled flowers with my fingers, sit in the gardens and admire the amazing structure before me. I learned more about the history and the love story behind the amazing mausoleum. The white marble changes color under different types of sunlight. All of the detailed decoration was done by hand and hundreds of years ago. Hearing about the construction gives one a whole new level of appreciation to the beauty and wonder of the architecture. The whole structure took over 22 years to build. The emperor Shah Jahan built it in memory of his great love, his wife Mumtaz Mahal, who was one of three wives. She was the last wife he married and they were truly in love. She traveled with him everywhere. They were on a military expedition when she passed away during childbirth. He was so upset, he decided to build a symbol of their love. Over 350 years later, that symbol still stands today.

The structure was built around her body. Her grave is perfectly symmetrical with the entire architecture. There are four columns on each corner of the structure, they are each built leaning slightly away from the Taj. This way in case there is ever an earthquake, they will fall away from the building and not onto it.

I slowly walked to the Taj. I walked all around the graves, admiring the amazing art work and architecture. I sat in the gardens and watched it. I daydreamed about visiting other wonders of the world and sharing them with those I love. I watched all the other tourists and visitors as they came to admire, take pictures, and experience the Taj in person.

If anyone gets the chance, I highly recommend it. The next time I go, I definitely want to see it in during sunrise or sunset … or under a full moon.

Small memories that will stay with me …

Men carrying loads of bricks on their heads, on their way to the construction sites, also carrying baskets filled with rocks or sand or other building materials.

Skinny cows and lots of stray dogs. In Murshidabad, as we would drive away from the city we were staying in and towards the villages, the cows would get skinnier and there would be less dogs around.

Cows standing in the middle of busy intersections, not moving and not caring they were blocking all sorts of traffic.

Knowing we were getting totally ripped off by cab drivers when the ride would take significantly longer one way or the other, but not knowing the streets or city enough to be able to know how they should go or to even know we were getting ripped off till the end of the ride.

A two hour traffic jam, a single line of cars that was endless, probably went less than a mile. Never seen traffic so bad. Was almost fun because it was so ridiculous. At least I wasn’t by myself.

Cows eating trash because there is so much of it around, and so much of the grass here (in the north) is dry.

Drinking fresh coconut milk on a boat ride on the river ganger. Sitting on the edge of the boat and hanging our feet in the water as we were going.

The greenery of West Bengal. How dry the north is. They are still waiting for the rains to come. Driving around you can see that all of the fields are brown.

Crossing the street – always an adventure, no matter where you are. I remember when I first got here and saw people crossing the street I thought that would be something I would never be able to do. Now I do it no problems. But with the crazy driving and people just doing what they want, it is still something you have to be very careful about.

Women biking in their saris. It seems hard enough to wear one (to me) much less bike in them – so impressed!

Rickshaw drivers at night, lined up along the side of the street. Sleeping on or under their rickshaws. Their means of livelihood also being their shelter.

The hawkers trying to sell you everything from jewelry and postcards to batteries and zip drives.

Watching Bollywood movies in Hindi. Loving each one.

The children in the villages, so curious, so brave, all wanting to get a look at me, all wanting to see the pictures I was taking. The little boys and girls looked exactly the same, usually only wearing small shorts because it was so hot, and for the same reason all had a very short hair cut close to their heads. You could the girls because most had their ears pierced and some their noses or wore necklaces.

An old man taking a bath in the public well. A toddler girl going to the bathroom in the street. Neither being an isolated incident.

The first coop of chickens I saw on the side of the road, knowing they were to be sold as food. And then looking to the left of them and seeing a dirty chopping block, a bucket, a machete, and a pile of dirty feathers.

Accidents Waiting to Happen

While riding on the rickshaw one night heading back to JU, the rickshaw in front of us stopped short. We bumped into it. The rickshaw behind us bumped into ours. Other than the small jolts, I thought nothing of it, until I looked behind me and saw a girl flying through the air. On the rickshaw behind us a girl of probably about 7 had been sitting on the laps of her mother and another woman. The jolt caused her to be thrown from the rickshaw into the street. We were on a small side street with very little traffic, thank goodness. She started crying. A man from the store we were in front of came out and helped her up and onto a bench. She seemed to be fine, just shaken up. But I don’t really know because during this the rickshaw in front of us started moving and we were back on our way.

It was a jolting reality check of how dangerous things are. The rickshaws are the environmentally friendly option when it comes to local transportation. And with traffic and all the people they are sometimes the only choice. But they are flimsy structures that provide no protection in case of an accident. And forget about seat belts, most of the cars I was in did not even have seat belts in the back seat. Everyone also bikes, but no one wear’s helmets. There are motorcycles everywhere, and only some people wearing helmets. I can’t help but think about how dangerous that is for the riders. The small accident I witnessed was a shocking reality that it does not take much force to have a real impact and for the potential for real harm to occur. But don't worry, mom, I'm fine.

Temple

This next post is hard to write because the experience that I had was just indescribable, but I want to try and I want to share it. I visited the grounds of the temple for Sri Ramakrishna along the bank of the Ganges River. The grounds are simply beautiful, the gardens were amazing and the view along the Ganges was breath taking. It was an incredibly peaceful and serene spot. (Unfortunately no photography was allowed anywhere so I will not have pictures of this to share. There were also signs forbidden clothes washing at that point in the river.)

But the highlight was the prayer. Every evening they ring the bells and everyone is asked to leave the grounds. At that point you can either exit or go into the main temple where they have a prayer service. We went in and sat in the back. I watched as people prayed. There was music and singing. Chanting and praying. There were bells and drums. The room was filled with people. Everyone was sitting cross legged and sitting up straight. The priests and students were towards the front and singing. I cannot even begin to tell you how beautiful it was. I was expecting to go and witness a cultural event, something I would watch but feel disconnected from, even if I found it beautiful. Instead I experienced an incredibly moving, personal, and spiritual event. It was very meditative to sit there and listen to the songs, and I soon found myself lost in my own prayer. I was very moved and surprisingly very emotional. I realized soon that part of it was because how much at that moment I felt the presence of my daddy. I felt him there with me and it was an incredibly peaceful and sad and special moment. It was so nice to feel him there and sad because I miss him so much.

The evening was incredibly moving. One that I will not forget. Everything about it was so special. The temple, the river, the gardens, my friend bringing me there, the music and songs, all of it. I know there are a lot of religions in India and that a lot of people come here for spiritual reasons. But I was not expecting that to be any part of my trip here because I knew I would be so busy with work. So it was completely unexpected and the evening really connected me to everything around me, to this country and land, and to myself.

Happy Friendship Day!

There is a holiday on India, on the first Sunday of every August called Friendship Day. Similar to Mother’s and Father’s Day, this day is set aside simply to celebrate your friends. Let them know how special they are and thank them for being your friend. People exchange friendship bracelets with each other. It is really nice and on friendship day, everyone you meets greets you with “happy friendship day!” I think this is a holiday that should catch on (and I’m kinda surprised it hasn’t given the potential revenue for the greeting card industry). I think it is really nice to have a special day just for your friends.
So in the spirit of friendship day: to all of my friends out there – I love you all! I would not be on this trip without the support you have given me over the past couple of decades. From my friend who I knew since before we were first born to those that I have made on this trip, from Harbor, to AU, to Advocates, to Cal: you all mean something incredibly special to me. Thank you for being my friend!

Hospitality

One of the many aspects of this country that has impressed me so much is the generous hospitality of everyone I have met. I have been invited into homes, served tea and biscuits, served more food then I could possibly eat, given rest from the sun or the rain in a cool or dry spot, and always made to feel incredibly welcome. I have eaten several meals with families here of other researchers and students, and each time is another memorable experience. The home cooked food is always delicious and they have by far been the best meals I have had. And the food continues to come. Once we stopped by a student’s aunts house to meet her and say hello. She first served us plates of fruit and chips, then brought tea and biscuits and samosas and sweets. It was all so delicious. And just when we finished and were full and I thought we were about to leave, she brings out the plates of rice for everyone. And then following it comes serving after serving of vegetables and chicken and then of course more sweets. Everybody’s family is warm and inviting. I am continually impressed by how nice everyone here is.

Tourist spots

The first afternoon I spent in Delhi, I saw more other foreigners than I had in my entire six weeks combined. Not totally sure how I felt about that; I know I wasn’t thrilled. I have been going to typical tourist spots, which was why. It was interesting though because I have been learning a whole lot about Indian history and the history of different cities and places. It is fascinating information; such a rich and colorful history. But I’m not getting to know any of the cities as I would like. I am not experiencing anything beyond surface level or history class type information. Which is important, but it’s not how you get to know a place. I want to come back. I want to see them again, this time from a different view. Lunch time spots are filled with people from all over. It’s actually really interesting to hear all of the different languages and see all of the different people on their own tours, including Indians from other countries or other parts of the country. There has been a large group from France who started smoking right away, a group of students and a few teachers from England, several families, lots of young couples, and small groups of friends. Very few other people are by themselves. But I would still prefer to eat in places that are not absurdly priced. At some of the monuments I like to sit near the guides and hear them speak in Hindi to each other. I think it would be better to get a mix rather than what I am getting now. The tourist and the historical perspective are important and fun to get, but you miss so much of the culture, of the places, of the people. I want to come back and experience more.

Quick update from Kolkata

I am back in Kolkata. My friend left on Monday and I was sad to see her go. It is a busy week though and I can't believe it is already almost over. My days are packed full of meetings and this evening I am going to get to see more of the city, which will be fun because I've been so busy since I got here that I haven't seen too much yet. Some of the students and former students here at JU have been going to my meetings with me and will be taking me around. It's been really fun getting to meet new people.

I will post more updates soon about the end of my trip. I leave for Delhi Friday morning and have booked a tour to take me to the Taj Mahal and several other places that weekend. I will be home one week from today - so crazy that this trip is almost over! How did it go by so fast?